Let every man have a magic wand Part 3

Earn yourself a better life and nicer emotions. Don’t let the fire go out. Hang on to what’s valuable, but don’t let it pull you back.

Old couples, old desires
At what point is a relationship considered old? Is it normal for desire to cool? There are lots of problems and question marks circulating around the subject of long-term marriages. It would be a good idea to learn about this as early as during one’s teenage years in order to understand by the end of our lives… – no way! – as early in life as possible what the essence of a relationship is and what laws it is operated by. We have to do this in order to build up our own lives and intimate spheres in the right way.

Instead of doing this, everyone seems to reach the same dead end – even though we have been shown these things many times through witnessing others’ lives, and also through films and novels. The essence is built into the story; into the pictures, the movements, the music; it’s also observable in a good dramatic structure. Why can’t we make better use of it?

It was believed for a while that the intimate sphere is one of the developments of civilized society. Later, revolutionary changes took place in order to bring people closer to nature and make them expand the narrow bounds of intimacy. But in fact “intimate” and “natural” are one and the same thing.

It was a good idea to object to the boundaries drawn up by ignorance and mock intimacy because they were unnatural and artificial – but by now it has become clear that there is a certain natural boundary that should not be overstepped. Though it is possible, there is an enormous price to be paid for it.

Partners lose their sense of intimacy and fail to let their intimate spheres develop; therefore they grow bored of themselves, of their own life and their mutual life as well. Because while they were very curious to find out everything about each other, they had to be glued together: one body, one soul. When this bond started to become looser, they attempted to preserve it through artificial methods because they were afraid of coming to an end; they were afraid of splitting up and letting the world inside in order that it may replenish them.

To love as a living thing
It’s important to know that a relationship between living people is itself a living thing. It has its own laws – both unique ones and general ones. A living relationship has a beginning and an end, which – at the time of meeting – may be one minute, one year, or a whole lifetime. But the days that follow the first meeting may change everything, and this may change the duration of the relationship. This is how a one-day relationship may turn into one that lasts for 10 years, and a 3-week one into one that lasts for 3 hours. In the first minute it was a certain way and then it changed: meanwhile, its viability kept fluctuating. This is something that can be influenced; and those who are clever can direct it in a way that will help them reach their goal.

Would you like to keep your love alive forever? You need to work hard at it, but it is worth it. You have to work on it every day; build it up; increase its vitality; fuel desire. You can never settle for what was good for you the day before. And what’s the role of orgasm in all this? I will tell you in the next section.